Wasting days doing nothing. Watching the weather change. Listening to the rain. Running outside to catch the sun. Face stuck to the screen scrolling through mindless crap waiting for the war to end. Scared that it won’t.

The summer that almost wasn’t. The weather turned cold and wet. One day spent at the beach, swimming and sunbathing. One day that felt like summer holidays, salt in your hair and sun in your skin. One day to last a long dark winter.

But that’s not entirely true. There were moments. Short glimpses when the clouds cleared and the sun appeared, usually late in the afternoon or in the evening, when the wind died down. Time for a pleasant stroll along the country roads, or dinner outside, a glass of wine watching the sun go down. Or waking up for a pee and catching the sunrise at 5 am.

These will be moments that I will bring out to warm my frozen soul to in the December darkness.